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Saturday, April 19, 2003
DO NOT EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST
Repeat: Do NOT email this pornographic photo to the Middle East ...

Little Green Footballs has an entry concerning
Post Office Dhimmitude.

Read the article and the comments and then banish all thoughts of EMAILING THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST!

Remember, we must show the Iraqis the same respect for their culture that they recently demonstrated to the world during their spontaneous artifact redistribution festival.

It would be a cultural crime against humanity to EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST!

Imagine how upset they would be if any infidel dared EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST!

Think of all the shoe stores that might be looted to provide footwear to whack this photo if thousands upon thousands of people were to EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST!

So PLEASE, do NOT download this pornographic photo and EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST. And do not TELL ALL YOUR FRIENDS to download this photo and EMAIL THIS PORNOGRAPHIC PHOTO TO THE MIDDLE EAST.

I hope I've made myself clear.





PHANTOM, FARE THEE WELL Who are these invisible visitors who quietly come and silently pass who pause and press at the window here but leave no prints upon the glass?


Friday, April 18, 2003
Test...twiddle-twiddle...


Thursday, April 17, 2003
BAGHDAD BOB PULLS OWN STRINGS TOO TIGHT? Dead by ... hanging?! Nuts! CNN and Al-Jeez!-Really? gave him enough rope to last for years!


Wednesday, April 16, 2003
DICK SMOTHERS, JR. SEEN nowhere NEAR DAMASCUS!
Meta-mis-tagging and disgooglation ...

Not everything you wanted to know about DICK SMOTHERS, JR. can be found at Thimbleful of Thorns.

In fact, I was cliche-fully unaware of DICK SMOTHERS, JR. until I stumbled, sober, on a blog complaining about how many GOOGLE HITS for DICK SMOTHERS, JR. he'd gotten.

Since then, though, I have UNCONFIRMED REPORTS that BAGHDAD BOB never said he saw DICK SMOTHERS, JR. not ENTERING BASRA in a FLAMING pink TANK.

Which, of course, I take with a grain of salt.

Add to this that SYRIAN PRESIDENT ASAD, BAGHDAD BOB, and DICK SMOTHERS, JR. SHARE THE SAME ZODIAC SIGN with people other than themselves, and that DONALD RUMSFELD SAID ON CNN absolutely nothing about the fact that he has no SPECIFIC KNOWLEDGE THAT DICK SMOTHERS, JR. WENT TO HIS HIGH SCHOOL PROM WITH MARILYN MONROE.

I'm only sorry that this doesn't do much to settle the question about whether JOHN KERRY WILL CHOOSE DICK SMOTHERS, JR. AS HIS RUNNING MATE IN 2004.

UPDATE : The GUARDIAN NEWSPAPER has never written a word implying that TONY BLAIR REFUSED TO COMMENT ON WHY JOHN HOWARD HAS NEVER ANSWERED THE QUESTION ABOUT WHETHER DICK SMOTHERS, JR. AND ELVIS WERE IN THE SAME ROOM WHEN PETER ARNETT INTERVIEWED SADDAM HUSSEIN!



THANK YOU - 2000+ READERS!
Not to mention ...

Drop by the Old Thorns (archives). Each one is individually wrapped in its own virtual pyramid to "lock in the sharpness"--just behind the lettuce and razor blades ...



Monday, April 14, 2003
WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP SO LATE?
I have no Late Show, ergo bloggum ...

If I were you, I'd see if there were any old Cagney movies on, Or Edward G. Robinson. Or youngish Peter Lorre in "The Man Behind the Mask".



Sunday, April 13, 2003
LIKE, MAN, IT'S SO, LIKE ... SURREAL! Watching the clocks melt keeps me sane ... Religion of pieces - What tickled me yesterday was the CNN report of the letter to a local imam asking if it was okay to ... loot. Really, how are these guys going to pedal a democracy up to speed if they can't show a little initiative? On the other hand, an approximation of the concept of private property exists in Iraq. Pillagers aren't smacking each other on the noggin with shoes--whoever calls "dibs" first gets the swivel chair. We can build on this! The low Baghdad after-Christmas Sale body count will be the envy of the world. True, it's a shame they sacked the Museum of Old Stuff We Dug Up to Prove We Got a Culture--but hey, nobody tried to cut in line! And if that weren't enough proof of serious civility--how about those lynch mobs? Ain't none. A more depraved cowboy populace might be riding hell-for-leather to string up Testicle Tom and the Rusty Plier Boys before they stampede over the border, down Syrico way--or at least sheep-shear a few Collaborator Connies, but not the Iraqis. Nope, no way. Sophisticated folks need to cast off symbolic yokes. And nothing beats a statue, except of course, beating a statue. Sure, thirty years of rape-rooms and maximum security kiddy prisons was rough. Not to mention a generation composted in the holy war against Iran. But, Allah! Those semper infidel MARINES! That's the final straw. ... Now, if you'll excuse me. Time's run out and I've got a train in my fireplace to catch.




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